Gifts for the Handyman

Built with occasional blood loss. The man who considers a project finished only when he needs a bandage. He knows where the first aid kit is but refuses to go looking for it until the job is done.

Great gift for handymen, DIY dads, and guys who treat a scrape as a badge of progress.

Not all of it was planned. The man who understands that progress is usually just a series of controlled accidents. He is not surprised when the instructions do not match the reality.

Great gift for DIY dads, handymen, and anyone who has ever had to fix their own mistakes.

Better maintained than the guy driving it. The man who changes the oil every 3,000 miles but hasn't seen a doctor since the nineties. Priority is given to the machine.

Great gift for car guys, mechanics, and dads who take better care of their trucks than their knees.

I'll get to it after. After has not yet arrived. The guy who operates on his own timeline. The task is noted and the priority is set.

Great gift for husbands with a long to-do list and dads who finish things when they feel like it.

Maximum load, still operational. The guy who handles the overtime, the broken water heater, and the family schedule simultaneously. Capacity is reached, but the system is not failing.

Great gift for busy dads, handymen, and the guy who refuses to make two trips from the car.

No available threads. The guy who is currently operating at maximum capacity and has stopped taking new orders. The system is full and the shop is closed.

Great gift for programmers, mechanics, and dads who are officially at capacity.

In attendance. But thinking about the truck. You are physically present at the event, but your mind is in the driveway or the garage. The guy who knows exactly how much torque he needs and how many miles are left on the tires.

Great gift for truck guys, gearheads, and men who would rather be in the driveway than at a wedding.

Body present. Mind garage. The man who can hold a conversation while mentally rebuilding a carburetor. Physical attendance is mandatory but focus is strictly reserved for the workbench.

Great gift for the guy who spends more time thinking about his project car than the dinner conversation.

Please wait. I'm thinking. The guy who doesn't work on your timeline. Processing at the speed of experience.

Great gift for developers, handymen, and dads who need a minute to process the request.

It was there when I arrived. Not anymore. The man who fixes the problem and doesn't wait around for the credit. Some things are better off gone.

Great gift for software engineers, systems admins, and anyone who makes problems disappear.

Not on call. Never stops getting calls. The guy everyone calls when something breaks at 9pm. Everyone has his number and everyone knows he will answer.

Great gift for infrastructure dads, handymen, and the guy who can't finish a meal without the phone ringing.